Honey Santana - impassioned, willful, possibly bipolar, self-proclaimed "queen of lost causes" - has a scheme to help rid the world of irresponsibility, indifference, and dinnertime sales calls. She's taking rude, gullible Relentless, Inc. telemarketer Boyd Shreave and his less-than-enthusiastic mistress Eugenie - the fifteen-minute-famous girlfriend of a tabloid murderer - into the wildreness of Florida's Ten Thousand Islands for a gentle lesson in civility. What she doesn't know is that she beign followed by her Honey-obsessed former employer, Piejack (whose mismatched fingers are proof that sexual harassment in the workplace is a bad idea). And he doesn't know that he's being followed by Honey's still-smitten former-drug-running ex-husband Perry and their wise-and -protective-way-beyond-his-years twelve-year old son, Fry. And when they all pull up on Dismal Key, they don't know they're intruding on Sammy Tigertail, a half white-half Seminole failed alligator wrestler, trying like hell to be a hermit despite the Florida State coed who's dying to be his hostage. Will HOney be able to make a mensch of a "greedhead"? Will Fry be able to protect her from Piejack - and herself? Will Sammy achieve his true Seminole self? Will Eugenie ever get to the beach? Will the Everglades survive the wild humans?